It’s been a long time! Even though it’s been awhile, the time has gone by so fast for me. I feel like I was wanting to blog and write about what I was going through when things were hard. Now that things are better, I am wanting to focus on living my life instead of writing about this crazy journey I have been on. I’ll go back and explain what’s been going on since July.
My last 3 chemo treatments were harder on my emotionally than they were physically. I really breezed through them with out too many side effects, only about 5-6 days of feeling yucky and then I was able to pick back up and get back to normal. The emotional roller coaster I was on was another story. I was seriously a mess and had a really hard time being around anyone. Sorry for all that were or weren’t ;) around me when I went to the US for a visit in July. It was so crazy hard for me to go back to my old “normal” life and see everyone living and doing all the things they used to do. As much as I love you all, it was just way too hard! I was actually relieved to come back to Australia so I could finish out my treatments away from everything. I truly feel it’s been a blessing for us to be here through all this. It’s been my hideaway and I’ve really liked it that way. Being the center of attention for me is the worst, especially when I was sick!!!!
I finished chemo on August 20 and I honestly feel like my last chemo was my easiest one. I was so ready to be done and over it that I didn’t really let it get me down. After chemo my next step was deciding if I was going to do radiation or not. It was a hard decision, but I decided it was better to look back and say I did everything I could do and I am so glad I decided to do it. I started on September 22. The treatment plan was to go in every day (Mon-Fri) for 5 weeks. I went in the week before and got 3 tattoos so they were able to line the machine up properly each time I went in for treatment. Treatments were super easy. I would go in, change into a gown and then lie down on the machine. The actual treatment only lasts around 5 minutes. My last treatment is tomorrow and my skin has held up perfectly. I’m shocked and the lack of side effects I have had. I feel so lucky!
I continue to go into the hospital every 3 weeks to receive Herceptin (a targeted drug because my cancer was HER2+). I'll be doing this until next May. There aren’t any side effects from it, so it’s easy. I also started taking a drug called tamoxifin that I have to take for at least the next 5 years because the cancer was hormone positive. I have read some crazy stories about this pill, people call it some crazy names… so far so good though (I’ve been on it about a month and a half) and have had no side effects. Again, feeling lucky.
My hair is starting to grow back and right now I look like I have a buzz cut…. I’ll post a picture soon. I think my hair has been the most frustrating thing! I want my long hair back so badly. I miss just throwing it up into a top knot and feeling feminine. I feel like I look like such a dude.
Although this crazy journey is still going on, I’m putting it as far behind me as I can. I really am feeling amazing and all my energy is coming back. I am so grateful for everyone who has helped me through this journey and prayed for me and my family. We are forever grateful for your prayers and have truly felt them. I’m feeling like there is life after cancer and I’m ready to live it. I have been keeping super busy and enjoying these kids of mine more than ever. They truly are such sweet boys and I feel so lucky to be their mom. My sweet husband has been such a rock for me through all of this, he never for one second allowed me to think that I wasn’t going to be okay. He constantly reassured me every time I worried or felt like I wasn’t going to get better.
As far as getting back to you if you have e-mailed or messaged me… so sorry if I didn’t get back to you. Please try again and I promise I will respond.
xoxo,
Tori
