Treatments 2 and 3

I just took a minute yesterday to read back through with I've already blogged about and the experiences I've had and I am super shocked to read all I've been through. It surprises me how many of the emotions and feelings I've had were short lived and how time has already healed.

Not much has really happened since my last post, we are just soaking up the good weeks and loving spending time together as a family. The boys are doing great in school and have been such big helpers through everything. It's now winter here in Perth so we have had quite a few rainy and cold days, but one thing that comes out almost every day is the sun. It has been amazing to me to watch a massive storm roll in and then buckets of rain will fall and then minutes later the sun is shining. In some ways this is just like my life right now, I'm learning the sun alway will shine again and all we can to is be patient and wait for the storm to pass.

My hair started falling out about two weeks after my first treatment. It would only come out if I ran my fingers through my hair, so it wasn't that bad.... I noticed it really thinning on top so the night before my second treatment I had the boys take scissors to my hair and then Joe buzzed the rest. I really wanted to keep them involved with the whole process so they weren't terrified of me when they woke up in the morning. Their reactions were priceless and I don't think any little boy ever thinks they will be told to go ahead and cut mom's hair. Tate was very into it and Max took a little of a back seat kind of leaving the room and saying he wasn't sure if he wanted to see what was going on. All in all I totally miss my hair, but as long as I don't look at myself in the mirror without something on my head it's fine. I didn't feel sad about it, just like this was the next step.

The day after the big cut, I had my second chemo treatment. Everything went smoothly until after. There was a crazy mix up with insurance that we are still trying to sort out. This was the hardest part of the second treatment. I felt super upset, helpless, misinformed, angry ... a million things. 24 hours after treatment Joe gave me a neulesta shot to keep my white blood cell count up. This shot made me tired, but definitely helped with the side effects of chemo and helped me bounce back. Looking back and after speaking to my oncologist, the nausea medicine I was taking was just making me sleep instead of keeping the nausea at bay. I didn't really eat or drink for most of the week, I just slept and when I was awake I felt nauseous. The time line for this treatment was Wednesday, Chemo.. Thursday, frustrated and tired, but doing fine have shot and got to bed. Friday fine until about lunch time then rested. Saturday seriously slept all day (probably 20+ hrs) Sunday slept all day (20+ hrs) Monday slept quite a bit  Tuesday I started to feel a little better and took a nap, but just rested and Wednesday afternoon I was able to pick the boys up from school and things just got better from there. My energy came right back and I felt back to normal. I've learned to really enjoy the two weeks I'm better and maximize what I can do. So far I feel like everything is totally fine when I'm feeling good.

This past Friday I went in for my third treatment. I can't tell you how good it feels to say I'm halfway done! Everything went as expected on Friday, no reactions and the treatments actually go by quickly about 3 hours total. Saturday I did the usual routine and made the kids breakfast and cleaned the house, I was feeling okay but didn't want to push it so we kinda hung out at home all day. I took a nap in the afternoon then we headed to a ward activity. It was fun to be there with the family. I was tired by the end so I went right to bed when I got home. I'm so grateful we changed my nausea medicine... I've actually been able to kind of eat throughout this treatment and it's kept my energy up. I haven't felt the need to sleep all day. I have felt worn out, but nothing like last time. The nausea is under control, I just lack my usual energy. When I wake up I feel like my body weighs a million pounds so it's hard to get up. It's already Wednesday and I can feel myself coming out of it which is so nice. If things don't get worse, I think this treatment will be the easiest one I've had so far.

As far as my spirits, they are up. I know after surgery and even until after my first round of chemo, I was struggling. I feel like I have so much support around the world and the charity and generosity of others is unbelievable. I'm learning so much through all this and really learning to appreciate being healthy. I can't believe how I took it for granted. To live a life of health is such a blessing you really don't even understand until you are sick. To have to schedule your life around dr's appointments and hospitals is no small feat and then on top of it to feel unwell yourself it's no fun. The next 10 months are going to be long, but I know I'm being blessed through all this. 

 My latest look

 Porters favorite thing is to take my scarf or beanie off my head, fine at home, but not so funny when we are out.....

 Tate at the school lap a thon. He ran the entire time and ended up with 27 laps. Max only stopped running so he could jog a lap with Porter, it was the cutest! He ended up with 35, but tells me if he didn't run with Port he would have had 40. I made the mistake of pledging per lap because Max told me he could only run about 10.... Needless to say each time they ran around it was $3, whoops

Max after his school cross country meet. All the year two boys compete in a race and Max had a blast. His big boy teeth are finally coming in and it's so hard for me to get used to. As much as I want time right now to go by fast, I don't want these boys of mine to grow up.